Covid crisis plunged us into an existential crisis.
In our race for money, growth, technology and wellness we forgot we are fragile beings. We forgot we can get sick and die in the blink of an eye.We are so proud and sure of ourselves we forgot we are not invincible and eternal.
Nothing is more scary than feeling death close to us and feeling powerless to fight it. The isolation in our homes reinforced the feeling of loneliness and depression. We had only our screens for months to interact with each other. We never used that much of the internet to look for solutions to our bad moods. We are looking for support from religion, spirituality, our loved ones, our addictions…
But each person is different and we all choose different paths to try to keep balance in our lives: working out, reading, writing, getting creative in many ways, deeping into work, getting back to religion or developing a new belief.
Personally I do not consider myself as a religious person but more a spiritual one. I do believe in karma, doing good for me and for others and I do believe in the consequences of a negative mood. I never really got an interest into the sphere of manifestation, mindfulness, meditation, the law of attraction…until the past couple of years when I started to work on myself. I discovered many theories, practices, tools and resources…which I genuinely thought at the beginning was here to help us grow, like many other things.
Until the past couple of months, I noticed what was done on social media and I think out of our despair, there has been some kind of a misuse and confusion about all these tools.
It kind of seemed to me that people believed that if you repeat your mantras, spread crystals all over your house and meditate for an hour every day… your wishes will come true magically. Well sorry to break the illusion bubble but that’s not the way it works. Manifestation coaches, crystals, sage, books, webinars, workshops and retreats are only tools to help you on a journey of self improvement. The same way that sleeping, being active and eating well is.
I am not saying there is not truth to it and it’s not possible. But at some point you have to also realize what is just a new niche in the market of wellness, what is bullshit and what you can actually do for yourself (being real and realistic)
How to manifest what I want ?
You need to be clear about what you want. Write down the words, the feelings, the things you want to materialize. Also use visualization during meditation. You want to radiate a high vibe, the higher the better.
But here comes the tricky part: these things can only help you on a conscious level. You choose to meditate, work on your mantras and then take the actions to put things in place with different actual processes.
But you have to keep in mind that on a daily basis we are in control and conscious about only 5% of our thoughts… The rest is in the unconscious part of our brain, coded in conditioning we received when we were kids.
It takes a lot of time and personal development work to change these programs. You can work on it with a coach, a hypnotherapeute. You have to discover the programs you have been conditioned to believe. You have to discover your childhood wounds (the injustice, the betrayal, the abandonment, the rejection and the humiliation ) and work them with dedicated exercises.
The healing process and changes in our subconscious takes time. This is why you should also be patient and consider different therapies and processes over the months and the years.
I also see a lot of us getting frustrated of not seeing results coming quickly enough despite “the efforts”. But please, don’t think that manifesting is:
- “If I think positive all the time, good things will automatically happen”. Nope, having a positive attitude helps going through life curves but it wont stop bad things to happen.Life is all about experiences, some are tougher than others but always there to teach us something.
- You need to be happy and positive all the time. It’s not realistic, you will have tough days and it’s not gonna ruin everything. Daily life is not always about rainbows and unicorns.
- A vision board, plenty of crystals and positive affirmations will make it work. You need to be proactive and actually do something. Things don’t appear by magic just because you wish it.
- Everybody around you will agree with you and support you. There is nothing more annoying than people trying to drag you at church or get you into a new diet for your own good. Don’t expect your family and close friends to agree with you and follow your journey. Respect other people’s beliefs and if you want to be part of a community reach out to the ones living a similar path to exchange in a safe place.
- Being negative sometimes is going to “cancel” everything. Again, ups and down are part of our lives. You have to take time to live and go through your emotions. Do not try to swipe them under the carpet when they are negative. You have to fully live everything and embrace all the feelings and emotions happening.
- Only some special people can manifest and get what they want. We all deserve to have the best and feel fulfilled. Don’t compare yourself to others because we all have a unique path. If you are not where you want to be yet, it is because you are not ready, there is still work to do.
Even if you want a lot of things to change, it will take time and work. You can’t trick the process with rocks in the house and repetitions in front of the mirror.
Work the subconscious mind and also get to do actual work every day. Build a vision board but then create short, mid and long term plans and tasks to do.
If there is something really important I learned with my fitness coach is that we tend to overestimate what we can do short-term wise but underestimate the long term.
Don’t overwhelm yourself: build something realistic to your goals and resources and adapt depending on the circumstances.
I am not stressing this enough because we are particularly impatient (guilty as charged) and we want things NOW. But mastering what we want in life, our core values and our goals takes time and adaptation. What you want now might change in a year so keep an open mind to life’s surprises and surprises.